Share your stand up jokes
I ended up watching 20 min of Tim vine on the comedy channel last night… I’ve always been a fan of his machine gun one liners, there’s something amazing about the gradual build of silliness that works.
My favourite (best if said out loud):
“I saw a man in a restaurant snogging a shrimp – apparently he’d just pulled a muscle.”
As a long time ago in my youth (well early-ish 20s anyway) I spent a couple of years doing stand up as a hobby, playing the London clubs. I almost had it all: stage presence, a loud voice, silly hair. I was only lacking the ‘being funny’ bit or it would’ve all been great.
So last night I decided to try and see how easy it was to come up with his joke style (much to Mrs MSE’s distress in a sounding board role). The answer: not very (which is good as I’m going with his brother to see him live next month, so it adds a level of respect).
Here were my paltry attempts…
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“I was in a shop the other day, they put the heating on full blast, I complained to the manager ‘it’s over 90 degrees in here’ he said ‘stop being so obtuse!”
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“I went to try new equipment at the gym the other day; it just shouted at me contradicting everything I said – apparently it was a cross trainer.”
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“It seems they’ve finally found a cure for erectile dysfunction – that was a long time coming.”
Yet while they’re very poor, there’s something very cathartic about the attempt, so I thought I would see what MoneySavers can come up with (via the comment link) and see if you enjoy the process as much as I did.
Originals only please (if mine have any resemblance to any other jokes written before it is purely unintentional and coincidental I promise).
PS. Having written this I got an email from Mr. Vine senior (aka Jeremy) to say he enjoyed the obtuse joke and that lovers of Tim’s humour may enjoy this www.murraysworld.com/forum/chit-chat/tim-vine-jokes/
