Tesco to launch extra large condoms

I just got this press release. And as we’ve promised to keep you updated on all stories about endowment I thought I’d better blog it.

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Tesco Logo

EXTRA LARGE CONDOMS
TO GO ON SALE IN THE UK

New extra large condoms for well endowed men are to go on sale across the UK from tomorrow.

The condoms which are sold in packets off 12 will exclusively go on sale at Tesco stores in England, Scotland, Wales and N. Ireland.

The launch follows overwhelming consumer demand in the last year for a larger size condom.

Most condoms have an average length of 205mm but the new extra large condoms are 10mm longer.

Said Tesco healthcare buyer Nicola Evans: “These new condoms are designed to allow larger men more comfort than ever before.

“We know through customer research that there has been a growing demand for an extra large condom that is easy available in high street pharmacies.

“In the last year there have been more than 200 calls from customers requesting the availability of an extra large condom.”

The current biggest selling condom lines in the UK are Durex Fetherlite and Durex Extra Safe.

Other currently popular varieties are Durex’s Pleasuremax and Performa.

Added Tesco’s Nicola Evans: “We’re very pleased that Durex has decided to launch their new condom with us.

“True to the Tesco slogan we think that here is another example of ‘every little helps’.

Durex Extra Large condoms will cost £9.53 for a packet of 12.”

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Comment and Discuss

PS: And yes I did do this entire blog just to make one pun – sad I know. Then again I suspect Tesco did this entire release just so it could do the “every little helps” line – so I’m not alone.

PPS. This post from MoneySaver FlickeringEmber in response made me laugh so much I had to put it here – don’t read on if you’re easily offended… (I wonder if it’s where Tesco got the idea?)

“Loving the pun, Martin. Which reminded me of an email I once received, so I’ve copied and pasted from it:

If Only ..

Imagine if all major retailers started making their own condoms and kept the same tagline…

Sainsbury Condoms – making life taste better.
Tesco Condoms – every little helps.
Nike Condoms – Just do it.
Peugeot Condoms – The ride of your life.
Galaxy Condoms – Why have rubber when you can have silk.
KFC Condoms – Finger Licking good.
Minstrels Condoms – melt in your mouth, not in your hands.
Safeway condoms – Lightening the load.
Abbey National condoms – because life is complicated enough.
Coca Cola condoms – The real thing.
Ever Ready condoms – keep going and going.
Macintosh condoms – It does more, it costs less, it’s that simple.
Pringles condoms – once you pop, you can’t stop.
Burger king condoms – Home of the whopper.
Goodyear condoms – “for a longer ride go wide”.
FCUK condoms – no comment required.
Muller light condoms – so much pleasure, but where’s the pain?
Halford condoms – we go the extra mile.
Royal Mail condoms – I saw this and thought of you.
Andrex condoms – Soft, strong and very very long.
Renault condoms – size really does matter!
Ronseal condoms – does exactly what it says on the tin.
Heineken condoms – reaches parts that other condoms just cannot reach.
Carlsburg condoms – probably the best condom in the world.
Mars condoms – a condom a day helps you work rest and play.
AA Condoms – for the 4th emergency service.
Pepperami condoms – its a bit of an animal.
Polo condoms – the condom with the hole!”